Waiting For Sirte...

Isn't it weird... that there exists on earth... at the heart of Africa's northern coast... the center of our planet's map... a city that's isolated from the outside world?

Bitter, and strange.

In the past, every time we went to Libya for our summer vacation, I always felt that our trip would be incomplete had we not been to Sirte. For me, that city is Libya. The people there are my family. I can't explain my love for its atmosphere, I just feel... home.

I love how, whenever we enter the city, Dad would turn off the a.c. and we'd roll down our windows. The blast of warm Mediterranean air is so soothing, let alone that we normally arrive there around dusk, a time when the city's crawling back to life :)

Sigh...

What's it going to be like, when I go there again (hopefully soon) and it's post Gaddafi? Will it be different? Will the people change? How will Pros and Antis get along?

How will my family get along?

Sometimes I like to believe that my distant relatives who are Pro-Gaddafi are already sick of him and can't wait to see him behind bars. Wouldn't that be a relief! I felt extremely happy when my cousin (who's from the Gadadfa tribe) visited my folks in Misurata over a month ago and was cursing Gaddafi! :) Wow!

Come to think of it, my side of the family who are Gadadfa are not that well off because of him. Yeah, except those who are established members of the regime's military brigades... those have doorsteps made of marble! But in the end, they just adore him to pieces -___-" 

Many a times we've been wondering how is it Gaddafi forces are fighting for him? Yes, there are extremely relentless ones whom we've seen on countless videos torturing and killing innocent civilians with cold blood. But then, there are the ones who have one of two choices: either to refuse fighting and be executed, or to go to the battlefield and get killed either by NATO or Freedom Fighters.

What I know for sure, is that if a gun were pointed to my head, and I was ordered to say, "Allah, Muammar, and Libya only"... I wouldn't say it. Yes, it's just a phrase and one can recite it to save one's life... but there's the issue of principles and beliefs. Strength, Bravery. And people differ in that respect. Like, I can't ensure to anyone that any of the ones I know who are in Sirte right now (regardless of their opinions and backgrounds) would do the same under pressurized circumstances. I know a guy who stood in the middle of Sirte's biggest square and declared that he denied his family in one of the liberated cities in Libya. 

Okay, this guy didn't have a gun at his head but surely there's some other means of pressure that led him to do so. Could be fear of losing rank? Wealth? Or the usual, his life? Right. He might still be a loyalist for all we know. We're just talking.

And we're still waiting...

Hana S.

Gaddafi... Our Biggest Typo Ever!

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We're all busy lately and our lives seem to have changed. No. Correction: our perspectives towards life has changed.

In writing, there's this technique that helps you get warmed up and allow your ideas to flow. It's called free writing. You just write write write write without looking back at what you wrote, then once you're done, leave it cool for a bit (an hour, two, a day...a week?). If you're lucky enough to remember it again (jk) you go back to it and you notice that you're looking at it with a fresh eye. You read on and find yourself saying, "What the Hell is that?" "I can't believe I wrote this," and "Oops, typo."

Get the picture?

I'm not saying you use this technique in life. No. That's way too time-consuming, and what's worse, it would mess up your life rather than fix it. 

Perhaps, as Libyans, that's exactly how we led our lives. For decades now we've been using this weird technique of living along, stopping loads of times to look back and see where our lives went wrong, but little did we do to fix it. No proof-reading. No great big efforts to delete, copy and paste...

And we've avoided correcting the great big typo of all time... Muammar Gaddafi.

For those who don't know what Typo means, here's the definition: a small mistake in a text made when it was typed or printed (dictionary.cambridge.org)

GASP!!!

So, when you have a typo in your written context, the whole thing becomes out of proportion, and its true value is lost. Wait. It has no value to begin with. People might let it slide, but since it's all wrong, it won't get anywhere. 

Gaddafi's regime started off like that. It didn't have a good proofreader, and perhaps they didn't want one. Remember when you wanted to do something so much that you were positive it was right, and didn't want anything to come in your way and say otherwise, that was probably thei philosophy too. But wait a minute. This is not just going out behind your Mom's back in Ramadan and grabbing a piece of embatin from the kitchen and then think nothing's gonna happen. This is about governing people and bearing responsibility. 

Gaddafi's reign was all wasted in gaining power, entitling himself, his family and members of his tribe to rule and sabotage.

Going back into all that is just a pain in the head.

By Maya Zankoul ^_^

I hope we've all taken the opportunity to vent out during the past - long!- six months, to say what we've always longed to say about the regime.

Now's the time to start rowing in a new direction, a better one.

The revolution is definitely a blessing from Allah to get us back on our feet and claim our rights, and start living a decent life. We need to work hard, plan properly, and even dream properly! Let's not be selfish for everybody's sake and dream about things that would profit our entire community.

If you dream to be a teacher, add to that how you can devise a teaching system to whatever subject you're specializing in, and how that's gonna impact on your students... and then future students. You'll be saving the next generations!

If you're a businessman, think of how you can benefit not just your pocket but also the country's industry which would eventually help decrease unemployment rates!

It's great to dream big. But always think about how it's gonna affect the world around you. Now that's what I'd call success!

Surely you've been told at one time- or many times if you live in a "nagging" environment- to sit down with yourself at the end of the day to go through your daily activity. So, if you've done good deeds then give yourself a pat on the back. Bad deeds? well, make sure you regret them and make up for it the next day... or even better, your days yet to come!

Yeah. Do this. You'll probably forget sometimes, so make sure you train yourself. As you rest your head to sleep at night, before or after you say your evening Athkar - please tell me you do that T___T - and start interrogating yourself.

Our country's gonna be a great place soon, that's for sure, inshallah. The important thing is that we make good use of the time being and think think think of those stairs that will help us rise :) 

Nuf said.

Till next time,

Hana S.

Ramadan This Year...

Yet another year goes by.

It's amazing - a blessing too- to witness this holy month once again :)

It's also a relief that most Muslim countries are fasting together, or that our Lunatic didn't decide to fast differently than our freedom fighters. Lunatic: he can do anything!

This time last year, I was up to my ears applying finishing touches to my research project. The whole process was fun, but chaotic all at the same time. My family was here for the last 10 days of Ramadan and my deadline was a day or two after Eid. So you can almost imagine my being on my toes all along.

So, obviously, this year's different. My family's not here. It's my first Ramadan to spend alone; my third here in the UK. The first two my brother used to come ahead of time, enjoying the summer and then waiting for the remainder of our family to join in and then they'd go home together.

And then life goes back to normal. The dull normal.

But in the end, we get by. You remember you have a great faith in Allah, that these things happen for a reason, and I'm glad to notice that this predicament has made our family much stronger. You just don't know what they're doing every hour of every day, however, you keep praying for their safety and telling yourself that they're doing fine.

Fighting continues on the western front line of Misurata, and any wayward shelling from the opposite side is more than likely at any time.

Then again... there's the faith. You believe that nothing will happen unless it's in God's will.

Today's the fourth day of this blessed month. How're you doing so far? Are you pleasing God? Do you think you're doing it right? May Allah help and guide us all...

Ramadan Mubarak :)

Till next time,

Hana S.

A Dreamer's Dream

Every pro-democracy seeking Libyan is now dreaming of the day when Gaddafi would be ousted... for good! So many times we've heard people saying on TV or commenting online that they want nothing but for him to go. Months have gone by since the beginning of the uprising in Libya, and this dream still remains a bit far-fetched.

Earlier today, I was chatting with a friend of my in Palestine, and we were talking about dreams, what they mean and how to interpret them. It's amazing how dreams are signs from God that, in a way or the other, assist us in determining a few things in life. Dreams sometimes give you hope, but very often scare you.

Last Saturday I dreamt that Libya was finally liberated. In the dream, it was a Friday and a Friday that preceded the beginning of Ramadan. Get it? Ramadan this year is either this coming weekend or the beginning of next week. And this Friday is the last one before the holy month!

I woke up excited and full of hope. It felt great in the dream. How would it be like in real life!?

Have you ever had a dream that really happened in real life?

The thing with me, is that I dream of wars... and they eventually happen :( Freaky, I know!

I remember back in 1998 I dreamt that Iraq was under invasion... and it was just horrible. Almost five years later in 2003 the war started there...

This yearو around February 17th, I had a horrible vision of war in Libya. In my dream, I was in my hometown Sirte at one of my aunts' house. There was a huge rumble outside, like thunder, but very bellowing it shook the whole place. I peered outside the window and saw a Beoing 747 nearing the ground. That was really weird, because, Sirte's so tiny and surely its airport's capacity wasn't suitable for such planes. The plane got eerily near to the earth and everything was so quiet all of a sudden. I looked on, horrified, as the plane crashed into a line of houses in the city. Shaking madly, I ran out of the house and found people running around with no direction. I saw my Dad and was about to tell him what I saw, but he stopped me and said that he knows and he'll deal with it.

That's about it.

Days went by and the horror materialized before my eyes as news flashes of massacres and vandalism took place in Libya. The question then was: How worse can it get?

Now we all know.

Okay, I'm not this creepy person who claims to have extra-mundane powers with dreams that come true. In most cases, it can be labeled as a gift. I only get these visions every once in a while and I value them greatly, because they offer me insight on what is to come/what to do next... so to speak.

I love how God helps us make sense of this world through dreams. They are surely a blessing and I strongly believe in that, and to contemplate them is always worth it.

But don't try too hard if you keep reaching dead ends. Sometimes, if not most of the times, they're mere ramblings of your subconsciousness.

Did you have a similar experience with dreams you'd like to share? Comment below :)

Till next 'dream',

Hana S.

• i love how Allah helps us make sense of this world through dreams they are mere signs and i believe in them and contemplating them is always worth it

Why Do We Even Bother?

It's none of my business.

                            Why should I care?

                                                No, thanks. I'm fine the way I am.

                                                                                               ......

How many times have you heard these phrases and wished for real that you'd never hear them again... for a change?

Here's a better one:

Someone seizes an opportunity in an odd way and says, "I'm entitled to it. This is my share from the government."

Your share? Okay, nobody's gonna touch your share. But have you asked yourself whether you're taking it the rightful way?

Not so sure about that, eh? 

So, people start doing the same and crowding others to get their "share" or whatever (a scholarship, a loan, a car, a job...) without thinking twice of how they're approaching their goal. I'm not against seeking a better life. On the contrary. I'm just referring to those who slip tips inside their applications (per se) or pressure an "acquaintance" to put his file on top of the others because he's got a football match he doesn't want to miss...

I mean, will you seriously be content with your gain later on?

My point exactly.

The revolution in Libya was a sensation to almost all of us (yeah, never forget them Pro-Gs). Signs of liberation and relief was quite evident in the (then) newly freed cities, namely Benghazi and Misurata. 

Question of the day: Have you ever seen a Libyan pick up a broom and clean the streets? Voluntarily??

I sure haven't.

That's the difference between living in an era ruled by Gaddafi and another one that's not. This guy never planted in us the love of our country... in his reign. He was busy tending to his theory and making sure we all knew his phrases. He also made sure we were stuck on the fact of who's better than who, this tribe or that. But when it came to some kind of problem or legislation, he'd pompously say, "It's not my problem. I granted you authority to rule yourselves so you figure it out."

Meh?

And that's why, to an extent, we led a meaningless life... a life of selfishness. When we clean outside our houses, we make sure we do not exceed our doorstep (Yes, that does not include the two feet between us and our neighbors). So why do we even bother? Our leader doesn't...

He just doesn't.

Which should've made us wonder earlier than now... how did we tolerate all this?? How did we tolerate him? An unfair leader. A criminal!

So, now that he's out of our dictionaries, we are seeing brighter days and more still to come. My brother in Misurata said the city's never been this clean!! Now we care! This land is now truly ours and we're gonna make it look better so we can live better.

Cleaning the streets merely as an example of a series of my country's downfalls throughout the years. And it is but a significant event that turns the head ... that this is actually happening T___T

I'm so proud of our youths. It is sad that they did not get any schooling since February, yet, they have instead made good use of their extra time to do good. Imagine how constructive this is going to be on their characters once they become adults? Or how they're going to pass it on to the next generations... the trait of caring for our homeland.

It will not be amiss...

Till next time,

Hana S.

Advice From A Dying 40 Year Old

In Unity... There is strength

في الاتحـــــــــــــــاد قــــــوة

Remember that story we took when we were in third grade? The one in which a dying father advises his seven sons to remain as one after he passes away? Okay, if you don't even know it, it goes something like this in brief:

So, as I mentioned above, a dying father gathered his seven sons at his death bed for his final request. He gave each one of them a stick and asked them to break them. Naturally, the sticks broke easily. Next he showed them a bunch of seven sticks tied together and passed it to each one of them, asking them to break the bunch. Even the strongest son wasn't able to do that. That's when the father advised them to remain together as one bunch that no one can ever break, and not live as separate, vulnerable individuals..

:)

Oddly enough, I was reminded of this story at the break of our uprising in Libya. The past 40 years or so is more like that dying father. Frail and useless, yet provided us with this one last request. To stay together as one in order to defeat our enemy and gain freedom. 

I was happy to see many of us Libyans have stuck together during these merciless events. Online and on the ground. A clear message to Gaddafi's regime that we are united as people and we love each other no matter how hard they want to tear us apart.

We have proved our strength in the battlefields, fiercely fighting our opponent. We have proved our compassion with our prayers, aid convoys, emotional support, and generous donations.

Like it or not... we are one!

It's amazing that no one has stopped to throw blame at the past generation for not reacting to the regime earlier... because we know what it's like to be in fear. We hate it -definitely not proud of that feeling- but it's a fact that we grew up realizing. And because we have respect for the previous generation, we have more than willingly marked the starting point of the end.

Once more, I'd like to shed light to the strictly monitored cities of Sirte, Sabha, Tarhuna, Juffra and many others. There will come a day. I have no idea what to expect from those on the inside, but I'm positive that those on the outside (abroad) are doing a great job supporting Feb17. 

On facebook we are a lovely family. Sirte and Sabha pages are doing well to show the true image that Gaddafi has marred for more than four decades. Admins are truly respectful and are patient with those who feel contempt just because those cities did not publicly react.

We understand their feelings, but that does not give them the right to go hating on others. It's nasty to judge something you know nothing about and to make assumptions with no evidence is equally as mean.

Can we listen to the dying 40 year old period and stick together? And then tend to pleasing our personal egos? 

Thank you.

Till next time,

Hana S.

Smile, Though Your Heart Is Aching :)

Smile though your heart is aching

Smile even though it's breaking

When there are clouds in the sky

You'll get by

There's this weird smile on my face... my tired face... that woke up at 9am today to the ringing phone -__-

It was my brother in Misurata. He had told me yesterday that he'd be going to a cyber café, saying that it would be early in the morning. The warning didn't help, but I got up anyway and scrambled to turn on the PC.

As always, it was great to see him. Yes, he's lost a lot of weight in comparison to the last time I saw on webcam (back in April) but it's nice that he's smiling. There was a man next to him speaking loudly with someone on the internet, giving him a number... we couldn't help but laugh. The number was long, and I told my brother that maybe it was a code or something... his eyes teared with laughter ^_^ cute!

Ah, well. He said he was bored like Hell... there's definitely no sign of schools reopening anytime soon, and I'm really worried about how this will turn out. I know the important thing is that everyone is safe and sound, but it kinda makes you upset that thousands of students are kept on hold just because of that evil G-Jerk.

My brother told me about our neighbor's son who had been in Benghazi at the beginning of the uprising, and when he came back to Misurata and saw his peers, he teased, "Man, are you guys on drugs?"

-___- heehee ... yeah, because, just like my bro, many of them lost weight.

What's interesting is that my bro had grown an afro during the first couple of months of the revolution, and now it's all gone as he shaved it all. So, from being Abu Shafshufa بوشفشوفة he's now Muzeel Elbatsha مزيل البطشة

looooool

Good to look at things in a light manner, don't you think? This crisis has taken its toll on all Libyans... yet it has provided us with loads of comical material! ^___^

So, just smile... Libya will be okay

Till next time,

Hana S.