Diary Entry #1: La guerra è finita...!

Friday Oct 28, 2011
Dear Diary:

It's over...

The war in Libya is over. It all ended by the capture of Gaddafi himself last Thursday the 20th... in my home town Sirte.

It's so heartbreaking that when you look back, all it took to get rid of him and his regime was a prolonged period of fighting, massacres, oppression, disappearances, abductions, executions, sorrow, fear, threats... The scale of destruction and misery has spread across Libya. Sirte is no exception to that. It is now a city in ruins and its people are devastated.

The degree of suffering in Libya is insurmountable, at the time being. I hope my saying, "at the time being" does not sound too optimistic.

When man thought he was progressing for the better into the new millennium, he's disgustingly sinking in deep ****. As a normal citizen of the world, I feel embarrassed. And for sure I do not envy world leaders for their positions, because I'd feel really ashamed of myself for being one, if I were as passive they are, that is.
Wow. Shame on them! Hiding behind their piles of well-stacked money, and power. Shame on them. Shame on those who faltered. We've reached a time in history when the mass leads the country whilst the rightful leader stands like a wall flower, reluctant, worried about his rank, showering us with condemnations (which normally take ages to be excavated) that only evaporate in the air.

Right... why am I saying this? Since when did I ever have political interests? Or even loved them? "You're confusing politics with the humanitarian crisis in Libya," I console myself, "The word 'activist' doesn't necessarily have to be related to politics." Okay, shush!

I have no idea how they do this. I'm officially exhausted, both emotionally and physically. It kind of strikes you when you don't see things coming. "Be careful what you wish for," they say, and that's what came my way. But I'm thankful nevertheless. When you're earnest in asking Allah to grant you the means, any means possible, for you to be a part of a great cause. Then it's granted. And you can't back out.

A couple of weeks back I said to my colleagues on Facebook, "I need to retire soon!" and one of them replied, "You can't do that now! After all we've been through and us reaching the peak of things!..."

-___-"

This reminded me of Mustafa Akkad's son-in-law quoting the late director who once advised to pull the plug when you reach the peak. Isn't it wise now?

I'm not saying we should throw our campaigns to the wind... all I'm saying, suggesting is more like it, is to move at a slower pace now, to think rationally, to evaluate, and face the music. The new Libya is the hardest reality that's ever crossed my path. The new us that emerged is ever so remarkable.

An up-rise in Libya seemed so larger than life once upon a time.

Till next time,

Hana S